my friend had a great attitued toward this monsterous disease...I can't beilieve a strong guy like him is now becoming so weak because the damn chemotherapy...so many pain and suffering going around..I hope our lives come back to normal...
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our ski trip was fun..but I didn't ski;)..I never jump in the middle of something unknown;)and the world of skiing was new to me so I had to look all around the blue mountain and how to rent them first before I actually go skiing..as the matter of fact my friends and I were help for the other 3 who actually did go for skiing and if we weren't there they wouldn't make it that fast;)
well to my astonishment I am getting over the friend who backstabbed me really fast..;)ofcourse no complains about that...it used to hurt real hard..like my heart is being pinched every two seconds..but its amazing how a bit of logical deduction and induction you can really change your outlook on your problems or the things you think really are problemsome...

bad news............I can't beilieve that my life and everyone around me is collapsing:(...one of my friends had got blood cancer:(I am going to see him today:(
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A voice within (From Christina Aguilera)

Young girl, don't cry
I'll be right here when your world starts to fall
Young girl, it's all right
Your tears will dry, you'll soon be free to fly

When you're safe inside your room you tend to dream
Of a place where nothing's harder than it seems
No one ever wants or bothers to explain
Of the heartache life can bring and what it means

When there's no one else
Look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend
Just trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength
That will guide your way
If you will learn to begin
To trust the voice within

Young girl, don't hide
You'll never change if you just run away
Young girl, just hold tight
And soon you're gonna see your brighter day

Now in a world where innocence is quickly claimed
It's so hard to stand your ground when you're so afraid
No one reaches out a hand for you to hold
When you're lost outside look inside to your soul

Life is a journey
It can take you anywhere you choose to go
As long as you're learning
You'll find all you'll ever need to know

You'll make it
You'll make it
Just don't go forsaking yourself
No one can stop you
You know that I'm talking to you

Young girl don't cry
I'll be right here when your world starts to fall

Today in the news about the earthquake, they were saying that only moneywise donations are required and they have an overwhelming amount of blankets and jackets and other stuff that they are not going to send all of them to Iran. They said they will keep some for the in need people in Toronto:)I think its wonderful..but this whole experience was really eye opening for me..I begin to know people a bit more..I don't want to judge people but its just an observation..when I was handing the flyers and asking people to contact red cross on the side walks, there were people who would want instantly to help cash wise without any questions asked, they were people who would read the flyer and would come back for more questions and there were people who didn't even wanted to get the flyer..The fact that some people didn't care why they are giving the mony without any questions asked really impressed me..to be hounest I have been really spectical of these kind of activities but now that the table has turned I am getting a good taste of fundraising and its importance..I will care from now on..and I will help even if at this point I am nearly broke..the fact that some people had a generous hand..no matter what really made me think twice..I think this experience however was really for a sad cuase but made me a better person and that's why I want to thank God for the nth time;)
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A bunch of my friends and I after the fundraising went to see the movie "house of sand and fog" it was nice and as usual I cried..Shohreh Aghdashloo was good but the guy who acted as a persian man,which in reality he is not, was incredible..he acted as if his parents and his whole family are persian!!!very sad theme though...I tried so hard not to cry but I couldn't help it...then we went again to Pickle barrier but this time I ordered chicken salad...and it was sooo bad that I couldn't finish!!!I think chicken salad is not for me..not ever!!anyways I am going for the first time to a ski trip with 4 of my friends..I hope I don't break anything;)pray for me...
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I know this post has become really big but one of my friends said that the reason why someone don't tell you something is may be because they don't want to hurt you..I don't know I'd rather get hurt but know it from some one who you call your friend than hear it from other people...don't you think?

An organization is set for all the Iranian organization here in Toronto to participate in helping with the earthquake fundraising..Red CROSS has collected $300000 till now that $89000 of that amount has been from Ontario...with that money a new urgent hospital..Shelter and so on will be made..I think if they want, they can make a hospital in 3 or 4 days with wood..That's how I heard they did it in another crisis..here in Canada its very normal to see a complete house one day!!!again because mostly it is out of wood or wood composites...
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Another thing that makes me mad is the lack of organization in Iran! COME ON...all this money and help is coming to for the people of Iran and there is no organization not even the government can handle it...I have heart its a cias there...

To "Y" who wasn't man enough:
Hilary Duff
"You can change your life
(If you wanna)
You can change your clothes
(If you wanna)
If you change your mind
Well that's the way it goes

But I'm gonna keep your jeans
And your old black hat
('Cuz I wanna)
They look good on me
You're never gonna get them back
At least not today
Not today
Not today, 'cuz

If it's over let it go and
Come tomorrow it will seem
So yesterday
So yesterday
I'm just a bird
That's already flown away

Laugh it off
Let it go and
When you wake up it will seem
So yesterday
So yesterday
Haven't you heard that I'm gonna be okay

You can say you're bored
(If you wanna)
You can act real tough
(If you wanna)
You could say you're torn
But I've heard enough

Thank you
You've made my mind up for me
When you started to ignore me
Do you see a single tear
It isn't gonna happen here
At least not today
Not today
Not today,

Laugh it off
Let it go and
When you wake up it will seem
So yesterday
So yesterday
Haven't you heard that I'm gonna be okay

If you're over me, I'm already over you
If it's all been done, What is left to do
How can you hang up,If the line is dead
If you walk out, I'm a step ahead
If you're movin' on, I'm already gone
If the light is off, Then it isn't on
At least not today
Not today
Not today, 'cuz"

Today I volunteered to raise Earthquake awareness here in Toronto:)and Although it was cold I enjoyed every bit of it...I didn't think I would be able to go to people in the middle of the street and talk to them and give them flyers for the RED CROSS..it was a great experience I am very happy to do it...oh by the way..CITY TV did an interview with one of us and actually they took my close up too;)if you see the 6:00 news I am there;)anyways..some people were very welcoming but you know who were the worst?with shame..Iranians...some of them gave me dirty looks..but not all of them..there were nice ones among them...anyhow I wish I could do more..there are going to be more helps from MOHANDES and other organizations in Toronto...I love this kinda of activities...I wish I end up with something like this:)

I thought you were honest...I thought I could trust you...I feel like an idiot....I hate you...no wait a minute..I don't hate you I just want to pray to God to help me...I am sure God knows better....when were you planning to tell me?my heart aches..but you know why?not because you chose someone else..but because you didn't tell me...I don't even know I have the right to know or not...I thought we were friends..now I know the meaning of your labmates looks...when I came to you lab...now I know why they were laughing at me behind my back.....now I know they knew that I am a joke to you...I wished you had a bit of respect to tell me yourself...but I don't know why you weren't man enough and why I have to hear this from others...THANK YOU GOD....YOU SHOWED ME HOW SOME ONE YOU TRUST COMPLETELY CAN DECEIVE YOU...
Thanks